Ah...$#!T.

Ah...$#!T.

Things like this happen to super heroes all the time, right?
Who am I kidding, huh? I can't even fly right!

I'm a sorry mistake for a hero. Last month, I mistook and old woman for a bank robber and beat the living crap out of her. I also eye lazered her arm off. She shouldn't have had an all black dress on and a scarf covering half of her face!...In retrospect, I probably should have been able to see that she had just been to a funeral. WHATEVER, man! I sent her some flowers so...we're good! All is forgiven. I even attached a note to them: Next time, don't dress like a terrorist.

I had to lay low after nearly killing that old hag. It didn't help that I'm one of those heroes who's identity is known by everyone in the city. I was all over the news, there were pictures of me in bars! Reporters would climb up to my one story apartment window and ask questions...absurd questions! "Is it true that you hate old women?" "Do you dislike America?" "Did you throw a 10 year old boy off of a roof and save him at the last second, just before he hit the ground, just for telling you that you weren't his hero anymore?"...Between you and me, that last one is true--but that fat little scrotum sucker deserved it!

Anywhom, here I am now, flying way too high for even my own liking, getting sucked into a plane propeller. This sucks. It sucks a little worse for the hooker I was carrying. I like--JUST dropped her! I was taking her on a date to the top of the World Trade Center, North Tower. Romantic, right? She swears its not there anymore, but what does she know? She's a hooker! Eh...We're both dead now anyway.

Wait, I'm a super hero! I'll probably live through this! Score one for Douche Dude!